Being Single and the Lifestyle I Need to Create to Attract the Right Partner

By Shannon E Cook

Many people desire the security and companionship of a committed relationship. When both partners are emotionally well balanced and the relationship dynamic is positive and supportive, a commitment can truly cement the bond and create the kind of relationship that feels stable and secure.

However, it is important to select a committed partner with care. Unfortunately there are some people who are able to present a good front initially, but may have a personality disorder such as narcissism or sociopathy that takes some time and perception to be recognized. If you are considering a committed relationship and it hasn't been very long, here are 5 signs you might be wise to wait a little longer:

1. Your date tells you everything about him or herself right away, and expects you to do the same. This could show a lack of proper boundary setting in a relationship. Learning about someone takes time, and a rush to disclose everything and know everything about you can be a sign that these boundaries are lax or non-existent.

2. Your date seems like your instant "soulmate." Now it is possible to make a connection with someone very quickly, but keep in mind that some disordered and exploitative individuals make it a point to "read" you and mirror back exactly what they determine you want to hear.

3. You date pushes for a commitment very quickly. If your date is talking about marriage very fast, it could be that he or she is thinking about the potential monetary benefits of the union. It could also be a sign of significant insecurity. A real relationship is mutually respectful, so he or she shouldn't have a problem with taking time to develop the relationship into a marriage over a longer period of time. In addition, a marriage shouldn't be used as a way to fill a void in either person's life.

4. You feel empty and lost without a relationship. The best relationships occur between two people who are whole on their own, but desire to share their lives with another person with similar values and some common interests. If you feel as if you have to be in a relationship to be ok, consider working on yourself and developing your own life and interests so that you select a partner from a position of strength and careful selection rather than need.

5. You feel bad about yourself, shamed, or anxious around your prospective partner. Sometimes emotional abuse and controlling behavior manifests very subtly at first, so listen to your instincts. Think about whether your anxiousness or nervousness is your own dating performance anxiety, or a red flag warning about the person you are with.

Are you interested in addressing your life challenges from a holistic standpoint, assessing the physical, emotional, and relationship components?

For a free copy of my ebook, "Natural Methods To Fight Depression", click here: http://www.stoptoxicrelationships.com/gifts-naturalmethodstofightdepression.html